Desicritics Section: Culture

Introducing Astrology in Schools

Priyank Chandra — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 09:24:12 EDT

I believe astrology should be introduced in schools. This is my firm belief, one which I have settled on after years of observation. It is time we give legitimacy to a practice that most people in our country either follow or "see no harm" in not following. It governs the lives of many and is the "belief" called upon whenever any events need to be initiated. No matter how many hours of work are put in by the men of science and technology, the astrologers are the ones who gives us the green-light. Such is their power.

I digress for a moment. Most of astrology at least pretend to appear scientific, with a lot of pseudo-scientific bullshit and a long list of complicated rules that have seemingly been studied and practiced for thousands of years. But you know what I really despise? Tarot cards. I understand the need of humans to find patterns in the randomness that surrounds us. But please make an attempt to pretend to to look harder. Cards? Seriously. Is that even trying hard enough?

So anyhow, introducing astrology in schools will allow students to wallow in the power of determinacy. They can forget the bullshit about uncertainty and chaos, ignore the vastness of the universe, of which we are but inconsequential constituents and pretend that the infinite number of variables that have the ability to influence the course of a life are an urban legend.

We will create a population of determinacy-loving content fools, with no concept of existential angst, only resignation to fate or a desire to perform meaningless tasks in an attempt to ward bad luck away. The stars have decided our fates. Our destinies are riding upon all the patterns in the universe.

I concede that holding on to the illusion of free will is too much of an effort. Astrology provides you an easy way out. While supercomputers still struggle to figure out the weather for the next day, astrology claims to know far more with far little information. And all from the unique ability to look at anything in the world, and predict. And from the stars, we have already moved down to cards and dust, parrots and palms. In the end of it all, we now assume that a recognizable pattern has to run through ALL the events in the universe.

The ones who claim to have found it will tell us about it, help us plan our lives and negate the forces of the universe by taking money from us. By teaching astrology in school, we cut down on the middle man. Let every child in the country find his own patterns, and manipulate them through creative means to enable them to have a better future.

A Lesson Finally Learned

Purba — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 08:10:55 EDT

Once upon a time people bought gadgets that lasted them a lifetime, well almost. Refrigerators, television sets, we almost grew up with them. They did retire, hurt, once in a while but after a brief hospitalisation would resume duty without a murmur of protest.

Our first family car was a second hand, sky blue, Premier Padmini. It was tantrumy, would start at will and stop without warning causing distress, embarrassment and traffic jams. We had many a good Samaritan coming to our rescue, helping us out of sticky situations. Those days Delhi still had some nice people. When we finally sold it off, my Maa actually mourned for it. She loves mourning, animate inanimate notwithstanding.

Our first colour television, a Sony, lasted almost 25 years. Its images had become blurry, the controls cranky, but my parents refused to let go of it. They now have a 53 inch monster which conks off with alarming regularity.

Now that I have a household of my own to run, the gadgets have multiplied, look fancier, have mind boggling functions and come in daring colours. I can remove lint in a jiffy, colour my whites a ghastly orange in the washing machine and place my cup of tea on the warmer lest it get cold. I get cooled, warmed, entertained at the click of a button. But the life time bond is a thing of the past.

The Ray household does not acquire gadgets in haste. We follow a specific order. It starts with a thought. Yes, we need to upgrade our music system. Once the thought has germinated we nurture it. Sometimes we mull over it for over a year. The husband researches, compares and researches some more. We finally settle down for a state of the art music system. But the pleasure doesn’t even last a season. Within months a sleeker model with never-before-seen features makes a glitzy splash in the market, making our existing one look redundant. We start pondering again.

God forbid if any appliance conks off. I have been residing in Gurgaon for the last six years. Many errant appliances later, I can say with conviction that the millennium city has by far the worst technicians this side of the equator. But, the eternal optimist I am, I seldom learn from my past mistakes. I am always in the fond hope of an experience that will not be traumatic and have me close to a nervous breakdown. Every time it is the same sob story: a breakdown, frantic calls to the service centre, the reassurance that things will be taken care of in a jiffy (I wish they wouldn’t say that). It takes half a dozen trips by the technician, two dozen calls in varying decibel levels, threats, arguments, to finally get things back on track. By the end of it I have a hoarse throat and Rathore, Salim and Pandey jee in my speed dial list. Each ordeal later I sit and wonder, wouldn’t things have been much simpler if we had just dumped the damn thing and bought a newer model!

Ironically life is not meant to be simple, it gets insipid otherwise. We thrive on ordeals and challenges, we crib and we cope.

The spice came from unexpected quarters this time. My otherwise well behaved washing machine conked off after managing eight years of glitch free service. One freezing wintry morning, it let out a series of alarms and the heating function stopped working. Since it didn’t appear to be a major fault I decided to call the service centre and made the stupidest mistake of my life. To be fair the service engineer arrived promptly for diagnosing the problem. The circuit board needs to be replaced he announced. It will be fixed in an hour or two. Seven hours and a lot of chaos later it was discovered that the thermostat needed to be changed as well.

When you need something desperately it is always located in a far off city. This time it was Pondicherry. The thermostat finally did arrive after a week of reminders. Thank God, I can finally warm wash my laundry again, I mused. Famous last thoughts. Like King Bruce the technician kept trying to fix the apparently minor problem, and I kept rekindling my hopes. I would switch on the machine, a few minutes later the circuit board would get all hot and sultry and go up in smoke. My teeth had become blunt with all that gritting, my hair sparse from all that pulling. A second opinion was sought. It was discovered that we now needed a new thermistor as well.

A lot of heartburn and a few thousand rupees later our washing machine is finally working. It has become noisy, the heating element is temperamental. And here I am pondering yet again, would it not had been simpler had we just dumped the damn thing!

Last week our geyser started leaking again. I did not call the service centre, instead the husband dismantled it and we sold it to our scrap dealer for a princely amount of Rs 60. We have finally learned our lesson.

Tag me a Price

Halima Khan — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 08:04:12 EDT

Nothing in life comes without a price attached to it not even life itself. Does anyone beg to differ? Then I suggest you need to go check with your parents how much giving you life cost them. However, I am doubtful if you are interested in that so here are some tags, which might be more relevant to your existence:

The first in this category has to be phone connections, from luxury, they have become a much desired and sought out need. In the last few years, we have become lucky with choices; from pink and blue Telenor tawk shawk to red Jazz to bright orange and green Ufone there is also the blue and white Zong. The telecommunication has become so increasingly aggressive recently that other than pricing strategy they have to be very creative with marketing too. Well no one is complaining about that for sure; after all, it is a delight to get to see ‘bootilicious’ models dancing to irritatingly catchy tunes.

The sim cards are widely available now and at affordable rates too. It does not come as a surprise that everyone has to have two or even three nowadays, especially with dual sim phone sets gaining popularity. Nonetheless, it is major good news that governments finally realized its responsibility and the NIC copy as a requirement to issue sims is being strictly followed. The standard sim rate has been 500 with either free credit or talk time or a limited number of sms or all three in some cases. The summers wavered the sim prices for instance Warid sims are available at Rs.150 only. Ufone is giving three sim options, two are priced at Rs.130 only, and one costs Rs.150 only. Zong is the only phone company offering a phone set and a sim combo deal under Rs.2000 only. However, no need to rush this offer is valid for limited period which doesn’t end.

Prepaid service gives us ample choice in selecting the billing system that suits our calling requirements. There is the one-second billing, the thirty seconds billing, and the regular one-minute billing. In addition, there is also per hour billing packages with all services charging approximately Rs. 5 per hour. However, most of these low call rates apply to the same network calls. This trend has changed recently with phone services becoming more consumers’ friendly than ever.

Phone is not just a communication gadget anymore it is a whole entertainment parcel. Voice quality and connectivity is very important for cellular service providers, but to keep pace in this cutthroat competition value added services are of keen significance as well. Mobile TV, radio, web browsing, chatting, song dedication, quizzes, games, competitions, lucky draws and so on and so forth. Viola, your very own Pandora box!

Be it lovers sighing their nights away or friends trying to catch up on lost time or socialites sniffing for the up and happening or employees trying to do their job cellular services have definitely proved bigger blessing than nuisance. Moreover, it is a relief to see this blessing becoming progressively more affordable.

At the end of the day it hardly matters what code proceeds your number till you have a mobile set in your hand to flash in people’s faces especially if you have a pair of car keys dangling in your other hand. Yes the ultimate dream that every prestigious member of ever generation thinks obligatory to pursue, and thank God, for economies of scale that it is not a too far off possibility. There is no limit to how much you can spend on shoes and bags, agreed? Unanimously, of course! Conversely, I insist there is no limit to how extravagant you can get with your car too. Sky is the limit with how luxurious technology can make your four-wheelers.

Honda is a beauty but undisputedly it is the most unaffordable beauty in the market especially for just starting-off youngsters. The Accord 2.4 I-VTEC is quoted at Rs. 3,599,000.00; there is no way in heaven or hell that I am adding only to that figure. That one is for recommending to your daddy especially if he can afford the ever-rising petrol prices. If you plan to pursue this extravaganza, you had better hurry since ‘the unit price is subject to change without notice & at the discretion of Honda Atlas Cars (Pakistan) Limited.’ Though I am sure the helpful salesperson will remind you that the price prevailing at the time delivery of the vehicle will be charged. The luckiest you can get at Honda showroom is at Rs. 985,000.00 and you just bought yourself a City (manual transmission).

The new Corolla that hit the market just this year has four models including Altis1.8 VVTI (AT) and 2OD Saloon diesels, all four supporting sunroof, and they fall between Rs. 1,600,000 and Rs. 1,800,000. Toyota has fairer economical cars to its credit as well; there is Cuore available between Rs. 400,000 and Rs. 500,000 only depending on which color and model you pick.

Suzuki is not far behind in sales and car quality. There is the good old Mehran, even though it’s a little old fashioned it’s as reliable as ever. Then there is also the Cultus, which goes slightly higher but is in keeping with evolving trends. It costs around Rs. 700,000 only. Alto is available at an affordable Rs. 500,000 approximately. Even the slightly luxurious Liana is priced averagely at Rs. 900,000 only. The sporty jeep is the Suzuki car to cross the Rs. 1, 000,000 mark and that too only slightly.

Most banks offer leasing opportunity nowadays at fairly easier terms, if none of the above fit your budget.

Whichever models of whichever brand you end up buying its essential to remember, that with great power of that key comes great responsibility. Being careful on the road is part of your civic sense just as carefully taking care of your car’s maintenance is. This is not just for your safety but also for everyone else’s. Like every other product, the handbook that comes with it is important. Go through the warranty manual and fully understand your consumer rights to avail the after sale services to your best advantage.

Oh a point of information please morally all cars should come without horns.

Well by now, we have painted the picture with the mobile and a set of car keys but it’s not complete yet now is it? To be perfectly equipped for survival in this current age plastic money has become an important ingredient, cannot stress the importance enough so I will move on to what alternatives are available in the ‘sabzi mandi’. International banks have long realized how fruitful Pakistan is as a potentially very ripe sales base. The security threats are nothing compared to how rewarding the gullibility of people here can be. No offence in being an easy prey is there.

ABN now known as the Royal Bank of Scotland has been in the market for quite some time now. They are the only ones co branding their credit cards. There is the collaboration with Air blue which gets you free air travel when you mange to reach required reward points. Then there are also Ufone benefits of free talk time and line rent. HSBC has the standard silver, gold, and platinum credit cards. However the major incentive that using their card has is the more you use it in your shopping, traveling etc the more the bank saves for your child’s education. That is definitely a tempting reward point system. MCB bends more towards the debit card options so you get to spend only what you have. Hardly any fun eh! HBL follows the market trend with the green card and the gold card. The credit card acquiring process has no doubt simplified a great deal and the terms are more convenient with greater stress on wider opportunities for its users.

Most banks share the benefits they offer; also, there are more or less standard features. Even the credit card membership fees are as good as same with the option being Rs.2000/- and Rs.4000/-. However, the Platinum Card fee ranges from Rs. 5000/- to Rs.15, 000/- depending on what limit the bank has assigned you. The fringe benefits on credit cards are more or less regular as well with insurance given especially on travel and with discounts offered with redemption partners.

With wants and needs switching sides, fast price tags have taken a relative connotation; only you can decide what your budget accommodates. Nevertheless, there is definitely something for everyone now. Happy affording!

Alone, White, and Female in India

Deepa Krishnan — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 10:53:23 EDT

On a travel forum recently, a young Polish woman asked: "I am planning to go to India and would be grateful if you could tell me whether it is safe for me to go there alone. If someone has any experience in travelling on his/her own, please post your comments"

Lots of people offered her advice; most of which centered around dressing modestly (preferably in a salwar kameez!), not getting too familiar with strangers, avoiding isolated areas and dark alleys, and so on. Among the many people who offered advice, there was one gentleman who suggested she carry pepper-spray. This led to a protest by some others - What?? Pepper spray!!?? Why are you scaring tourists away from India??

Co-incidentally, I had just been reading a city magazine, a 'Women's Special', with a whole page devoted to staying safe in cities - and among the five things they listed was pepper spray!

So what's the right advice for this lady? Should she stick to big cities? Are they safer, or are they more dangerous than smaller towns? Are some states safer than others? As I heard various points of view, I felt obliged to conclude that there is no single truth when it comes to female safety in India.

But that doesn't mean there are no conclusions to be drawn! I travel alone, frequently, to different parts of the country, and from my own interactions with men, I find that some parts of the country are disconcertingly hostile to women and disparaging of their bodies, whereas other places are a delight.

I was in Orissa recently, and I have to say I did not encounter one single lecherous man; it was a fantastic experience. I have spent two years in Calcutta, again, without so much as a single nasty incident in spite of late nights and odd hours.

I would rank Uttar Pradesh, Haryana, Rajasthan and Delhi among my list of difficult places for solo women travellers. (I have not been to Bihar, but I confess I have no great expectations from the state that produced Laloo Prasad Yadav). Other than Orissa and Bengal, I would rank Kerala among my nicest travel experiences, followed by Tamil Nadu, Andhra Pradesh, Karnataka, Maharashtra and Goa (in no particular order). I have no experience of the north-eastern states.

Of course, this is all based on personal and anecdotal stuff, and is therefore open to bias, but I suspect many Indian women would agree with me. If you don't agree, that's fine too. There is no necessity for consensus here. Irrespective of which state is better and which is worse, what I'm trying to say is that there seem to be some regional trends in the behaviour of men towards women.

I am puzzled by these differences. Surely we are all not that different from each other? Maybe it’s just that places which are more hidebound and stuck in the dark ages are more difficult for women? With a social structure that does not value women, it is that much more difficult to get the basic respect you deserve. But Tamil Nadu with its high female foeticide doesn't value women either...so it's hard to explain why I feel safer in Chennai than in Delhi. Again, this is also a sweeping generalisation. Some parts of Delhi (and I am writing this sitting in Delhi) are extremely safe and very nice to be, and some very nice guys I know are from Delhi. But I don't feel the same "body freedom" in the crowded lanes of Chandni Chowk as I do in the equally crowded Pondy Bazaar or Bhuleshwar or Gariahaat markets. Why? I wish I knew.

Sigh - so - going back to the young Polish woman - while there is no single truth about the Indian men she will encounter, the fact remains that she is likely to go through some not-so-pleasant experiences if she is travelling solo. Let's face it, this is a difficult country for single white women to travel. The average Indian man assumes that white women are alley cats and are potentially available - why else would they flaunt their bodies in public places, right? To add to this is the depressingly common lesson which most young men receive at the hands of their older friends - that's it's perfectly alright to ogle and whistle and grope and treat women badly. Indeed, it is very *masculine* to do so, as Hindi movies so brilliantly illustrate. It's not just white women who get the lecherous idiocy - the same disgusting treatment is accorded to very modestly dressed local women as well. It's a grim story, and one that always makes me want to decimate the entire male race :)

To the lady who asked the original question, I say, pack that pepper spray, girl! You may not need it, but you'll feel better with it in your purse.

Should Marriage be Abolished?

Sumanth — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 07:42:15 EDT

In old days, people mostly lived in communities in villages. The parents used to take care of children and the grown up children used to take care of frail and sick old parents. That was the circle of life.

Today, with the Americanization of the world, some new noble actors gatecrashed into this circle of life. They are the Corporates, Society and the Government.

Today, parents solely take care of children, and then they handover the grown up children to Corporates and Governments. The young children work for the corporates and pay taxes to the Government, which claims to take care of everyone. In reality, children do not have time for old and sick parents. I see a lot of respectable elderly people in the neighborhood, who explain their old age loneliness with tears in their eyes.

Even though there is a lot of pressure for Americanization of India by Helen Clark of UNDP, our Government does not talk about anything American like Social Security or Healthcare System for old people in India.

The returns on investment (ROI) on children by parents are virtually zero today. So, children should be the responsibility of the Society or the Commune. Osho wanted the family to be replaced by the Commune.

Marriage should be abolished. With that there will be an end to divorce industry. There will be no family courts, lawyers, psychoanalysts, therapists, priests, perverts, dowry takers and prostitutes. When commune takes care of all children, there will be absolutely no orphans in the society.

When marriage does not exist and children become responsibility of the commune, men and women do not have to struggle for work life balance and they will have more choices in life. The personal emergencies and shocks will get absorbed by the whole commune.

In the book Third Wave, Alvin Toffler wrote, "Nuclear Family has no meaning, when there is no nucleus at home." The Commune will fill richness in children's lives, where as in a marriage today, the child has to remain suppressed between 2 adults and their narrow identities.

The Commune will create an alternate circles of life with much more stable interactions and interrelationships.

Osho On Marriage and Children:

Abusing the British Welfare State

DesiGirl — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 07:38:59 EDT

The BBC’s Famous, Rich and Jobless (telecast at 9.00 pm on March 10, 2010) seems another in the long list of “Celebrity tourism”, as the Guardian puts it, to grace our television. A bunch of “celebs” visited various members of the public who are living purely on benefits to see if they can help them.

That the rationale behind the show was shaky as hell is another topic altogether. What I want to discuss is the issue raised by one of the celebs, Diarmuid Gavin, as he visited a big family receiving £29,500 a year from the state. 28-year-old Mum and 29-year-old dad are both jobless and mum is pregnant with her sixth child. They live in a massive six-bedroom detached house and the dad hadn’t had a paying job in seven years.

Of course, this small fact doesn’t deter him from having more and more babies, that the taxpayer pays for. When Diarmuid asks the wife what she feels about sponging off the state, she points to her husband and goes “it is his fault! He wants a big family.”

That left me speechless.

How can you have a child without figuring out how you are going to provide for its future? When you yourself do not have a job, how can you have more and more children?

Answer: Quite easy. Get the state to pay for it.

There was some sob story in the offing, of course, why the dad hadn’t got off his backside and found himself a paying job in 7 years but I don’t buy it. Both husband and wife used to do menial jobs before and chances of them pulling in £30000 a year are slim. But now, thanks to the gazillion kids, they not only have the money, they even have other perks like rent, council tax etc that are paid by the state, aka, taxpaying mugs like you and me.

Apparently, the sick bastard labelled ‘British Fritzl’ was “driven by child benefit greed” and kept raping his daughters and having babies with them because he got child benefits! Ba$tard wants a plush lifestyle and instead of going out there and working his butt for it, he impregnates his daughters repeatedly and bills the state for the childcare.

If these are not examples of gross abuse of the British welfare state system, I do not know what is.

I say give the benefits to the old, the infirm, those who cannot fend for themselves. The OAPs who die every winter because they cannot afford to pay their heating bills, give them the money. The disabled person who cannot go out there and earn her daily bread, give her the money to look after herself. The others, able-bodied ones who are sitting in the comfort of their six-bed taxpayer-funded life, get over yourself and go out there and get a paying job.

I used to work for a social research agency and one of my projects was working on the incapacity benefits – who was receiving them, how much and what was their status. The findings made my blood boil. Whilst there were genuine applicants, there were many who, despite their claims to go out there and work if given a chance, would rather sit comfortably and watch the benefit cheques come in month after month.

I say the simplest way to reduce the massive deficit is to completely rehaul the benefits system. If guys like the father-of-five-with-one-on-the-way had to pay their own way, I am sure they would stop whingeing and get a vasectomy first and a job next.

Mdantsane Dancing- Poetry of Mdantsane

Amitabh Mitra — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 11:43:42 EDT

the summer wink has left
a stray color shine leaps on an everydaycloud
an everydaystreet
grass flowers bloom around shacks
she touches her eyes
and her hips again
in other patterns
mdantsane moves in unision
i jump out
on an ecstasy river
my long hair
my face rushes
a changing sky
in perfect congruency.

Poem and Watercolor on a handmade paper by Amitabh Mitra

Unleash The Paparazzi Hounds

Priyank Chandra — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 07:15:58 EDT

I would like to have more active paparazzi in India. I want them to hound and stalk the celebrities. Capture them in their most human state, and make them fight to retain their status of being role-models.

Their opinions do not matter, and count only as any of us, ignorant fools. Yet they blog, they tweet and the newspapers capture every statement they give. These are the models, the item-girls, the actors and actresses. The perfect brushed-up groomed faces that speak to us from advertisements everyday. We live in a society where the intellectuals seem to be forgotten, only to be replaced by meaningless opinions of beautiful people who shouldn't really matter. And I am tired of watching debates getting hijacked by celebrities, who say the obvious things to an audience that has already becoming used to the dumbed down pop culture of the idiot box and tabloids, insulting to the intellectuals who have spent a lifetime working in the field.

If the media wants to give the beautiful the role of the public opinion creators, then I ask them to please unleash their paparazzi hounds which exist only to show the truth, not just the media-op moments of sculpted beauty.

I'm no sadist and I would like people to have a right to their privacy, but I also see the need for truth. You cannot go in one extreme, without a counterweight. If you show the glamorous page-3 parties and the actor's ghost-authored opinions about the Pakistan, war and the Budget, then please let us see their affairs and unglamorous lifestyles.

It is only fair. Journalistic integrity demands it.

Book Review: Bhagwata Purana, Skandha Two, Part One

Dr Bhaskar Dasgupta — Mon, 15 Mar 2010 19:57:57 EDT

You know my great idea about writing one essay on each Skandha? Well, I am afraid that it became impossible for me to stick to my original plan in the second Skandha itself, as there are far too many concepts and ideas that I want to try and do justice to. The Skandha starts with the story of how Vyasa Muni first composed the Bhagwata Purana (BP).

You might already know that Vyasa Muni was the original compositor of the Vedas, but the Purana is silent on when exactly he wrote it in Hindu cosmological terms, although we know it was written after Krishna’s death, which is tentatively given as 3228 BCE (according to the wiki entry). The Purana, on the other hand, says that Vyasa was born in the Dwapara Yuga. Take a look at this calculation which talks about some seriously huge time frames. Time is defined in the top level as Brahma Years. We are in the first day of the 51st year of Brahma (he is a middle aged God right now). Each day and night in an year comprises of a Kalpa, which is further divided into 28 manvantaras and we are in the 7th day manvantara. Each Manvantara is made up of 71 mahayuga’s and we are in the 28th mahayuga. Each Mahayuga comprises of four yugas namely Satya Yuga, Treta Yuga, Dwapara Yuga and Kali Yuga. We are currently in Kali Yuga. The time in human Christian Gregorian Years is roughly 432,000 solar years.

So extrapolating from this (and bear with me, I have no way of confirming this), Vyasa was born before 3228 BCE. Given that the average human life span in the Dwapara Yuga was considered to be approximately 1,000 years, he could have been born and actually composed the BP any time between 3228 BCE to 4228 BCE, but the actual book took shape in the 3rd millennium BCE. For the longest time, this kind of thinking about time blows my mind, but I have that down as a potential research project to think about. Take a look at this article by Ramesh Rao for an interesting perspective on time.

But let’s get back to the BP and its origins. The above is from a mythological perspective that is; the real truth is much more complicated. As of the current state of historiographical research, there is simply no evidence of when it was originally written and by whom. The wiki entry for the Vedas is a good example of the confusion about the dates on the origins of the Vedas, but it’s aimed at a date of 1,000 BCE. This sort of conflicts with the reputed death of Krishna around 3228 BCE, so what happened in the middle 2 millennia?

However, I am not writing an analytical paper here, I am talking philosophy and mythology. Hindu philosophy (if this kind of a formulation can even be said) simply has too many strands to worry about exact timing or authenticity of the author, unlike say the fact that Gabriel taught Mohammad the Quran or there is a gospel by Mark. How about the philosophy that time is essentially an illusion (maya)? If it’s maya, then is it really important to know the author or the time? We also need to know that if we start ascribing the authorship to a particular person and time, we run the risk of it sounding fallible, which really cannot be done now, can it? The other way of looking at this is that there is simply no origin or that the Vedas and the Puranas were and are: unauthored, unreal and eternal at the same time. When the (atma) soul can be pure consciousness without content, then extending that analysis to the Vedas and Purana can mean content without consciousness relating to temporal aspects such as authors or time.

The BP talks about how Vyasa Muni divided the original single Veda into the four Vedas that we know now, mainly because he realised that in the Kali Yuga, mankind cannot handle the full weight of God’s word, so had to be fed in small broken down chunks. He then gave each Veda to one of his disciples and asked them to further teach humans. As women, sudras and other impure members of the Brahman class were not eligible to read and hear the Vedas (don’t go there yet, I will return to this topic sometime in the future), he also wrote the Mahabharata so that even the women, sudras and impure people could attain moksha. But Vyasa Muni was not happy and less than satisfied with his work on the Vedas and Mahabharata. Narada Muni came around and identified his cause of dissatisfaction. Narada Muni said that he has not described the Lord Vishnu in detail and that is the reason why his work does not satisfy him. Narada Muni then proceeds to tell Vyasa his own life story and how he became a Vishnu devotee. In one of his past lives in another Kalpa, he wandered the earth in search of God and finally he sat to meditate for eons. Finally, Vishnu manifested himself to him and Narada was enlightened. Vishnu said that Narada will find the Lord when all desires have been quelled, but he will be with Narada all the time. Saying this, Narada departed leaving behind Vyasa full of determination to explore and compose the story of Lord Vishnu. Upon completion of the BP, Vyasa Muni taught the secret Purana to his son, Suka.

Then there is a bit of a jump and the third section talks about the life history of Pariskshit, son of Abhimanyu, who is the ruler of Hastinapur. Remember the story about how he was saved in his mother Uttara’s womb, by Krishna when Ashwathama tried to kill him using the brahmastra? Anyway, moving on, the BP talks about how righteous he was, how he banished the demon Kali (not the Goddess Kali) and saved one legged Dharma Deva, the God of Truth and Bhumi Devi, Mother Earth from Kali’s depredations. Interestingly enough, the four legs of Dharma Deva, who manifested himself as a Bull, represent austerity, purity, compassion and honesty, but Kali Yuga broke three of them by pride, lasciviousness and inebriation. Only honesty was left and even that was being destroyed by the Demon Kali. So Parikshit banishes the Demon Kali to the gambling dens, whorehouses, and in houses of slaughter. By doing so, Parikshit kept the demons of the Kali yuga at bay, but then disaster befell him.

He was hunting and reached an ashram thirsty and hungry. Looking around, he could only see a rishi deep in meditation and despite Parikshit’s entreaties; the rishi would not wake up to give him water or food. Becoming furious, Parikshit draped a dead snake around the rishi’s neck and rode away angrily. Then the rishi’s son came back, saw the snake, learnt the background and cursed Parikshit with death in seven days from snakebite. On his return to the palace, Parikshit was beset with sorrow and regret at his treatment of the rishi and then learning of the curse, decided to renounce his kingdom, go to the banks of the Ganga river, medicate on Vishnu for the remainder of his days while fasting.

When he sat down, a whole host of other great rishis came to him. Atri, Vasistha, Chyvana, Shardavana, Arishtanemi, Bhrigu, Angirasas, Parasara, Viswamitra, Parasurama, Utathya, Indrapramada, Indhmavaha, Medhatithi, Devala, Arishtisena, Bharadvaja, Gautama, Pippalada, Maitreya, Aurva, Kavasha, Agastya, Dwaipayna Vyasa and Narada all joined him. There is a reason why I am repeating all these names. These names are our greats. They have, in effect, given us our religion. They were the first teachers and telling their names again is a way of worshiping them, paying obeisance to them and recognising our debt to them.

Finally Suka Muni arrives and Parikshit asks him how best to purify himself before death, to which Suka Muni replies referring to the BP as the best way to purify the body and soul. Parikshit asks about the form of Vishnu that he would meditate on and Suka describes the Lord to him. This was a stunning description and I was seriously taken aback. I am not going to give the full description, but it involves patala, the soles of his feet, bhumi his hips, and the sky as his navel. Indra and other Devas are his arms, agni his tongue, the sun and moon are his eyes, Yama is his teeth, his laughter is Maya, modesty is his upper lip, while greed is his lower. Prajapati is his penis, while Mitra Deva and Varuna Deva are his testicles. Vayu is his breath, time is his movement. Twilight is the garment he wears, brahmana his mouth, kshatriya his arms, vaisya his thighs and sudra is his feet. This is whom Parikshit should visualise.

The formulation of the Lord’s description took my breath away. With my puny mind, I simply could not comprehend this vast assemblage at all, which is why I am quite envious of those who can. Can you imagine somebody being able to visualise this wondrous image? What an imagination one would require! What a breadth of vision, what faith! I felt so insignificant at just the description of the Lord Vishnu.

But now I have to draw this exercise to an end. In the next part, I will be talking about how Suka explained the way of the Dhyana, the route to Moksha. This is not an esoteric description, but something with concrete details which man can grasp. This will follow with a description of how Brahma created this universe and a description of the incarnations of Vishnu and ending with the numerous questions that Parikshi asks of Suka.

All this to be taken with a grain of piquant salt

Photography Times: Green Snake

Vidhya — Sun, 14 Mar 2010 22:44:00 EDT

Snakes are tricky creatures to photograph. The meticulous camouflage of the green snakes only makes it harder to find if what's raised between the small branches is the head of the snake, or just another docile extension of a leaf.

The trees and the branches were fairly thick making it all the more difficult to find where the snakes were curled away. And my idea for the moment was to photograph one with particular importance to the scales and the eyes. Green snakes have large eyes and blunt shaped heads.

After an hour of patient searching I could find a couple of them, not very far from where I stood, that could be my possible subjects for the day. One of them was looking downward as if it were about to swoop down to catch some prey, and the other seemed almost at the right spot except that it had its head turned away from me.

Making this photograph a bit more difficult to shoot was a disturbing ray of light reflecting from a glass enclosure adjacent to the green snakes. I sought additional help asking K to hold a bunch of books beside the enclosure blocking the path of the light from reaching the abode of the green snakes. With the books held high, I had to work on my zoom before the snake turned his head toward me, which - for all you know - may only be for a couple of seconds.

I was carrying a 70-300mm lens, so had ample focal length to cruise between the branches and leaves to get as close as possible to his head. After a few adjustments to the focal and the aperture to wade away the unwanted lights, I took position hoping the snake didn't hiss away into some other branch. I continued looking through the viewfinder wondering at the amazing stillness with which the snake stayed in his head-turned-away posture - an essential skill if he needs to camouflage and set himself up to catch an unsuspecting prey.

After about 20 minutes of holding my position, my shoulders starting drooping and I badly needed a sip of Red Bull. Even before I had a second thought on giving in to a Red Bull, the green snake slowly turned over. Looking through the viewfinder at close to the entire focal length of my lens, it seemed as if he was staring straight into my eyes. The large eyes and the scaly slimy skin - just what I was waiting for, and three quick shots later I lunged for my Red Bull.

Reptiles are probably the oldest of species to have ever existed on the earth. Reptiles are generally cold-blooded and their skin is usually covered in scales. Contrary to popular belief, many species of snakes are not poisonous, and do not have a history of being hostile to humans.

The Green Snake, for instance, tends to escape if threatened by human or other activity in its vicinity. A rather meek species of snake, they rely on camouflage to protect themselves and prey on insects like crickets, moths and butterflies.