Movie Review: Krrish - Koi Childish Gaya...
Desi Train
He looks in the camera with a scowl "Breaking News. I have now developed a computer that can see everybody's future. Now I will rule the world. HA HA HA"
A combined effort in the fields of astrology, astronomy and technology along with the sincere efforts of writers Robin Bhatt, Sachin Bhowmick, Honey Irani, Akash Khurana and Rakesh Roshan-jee, the computer is ready and flashes on screen the future...
You squirm in your seat, while chewing the last bite of your soggy samosa - the only entertaining part in this two and a half hour mistreat. And to think the "Breaking News" comes from the mouth of an artist you would willingly bow and prostrate to, makes the stomach kick upwards - your samosas, your soda and anything else you may have had earlier in the day. Naseeruddin Shah has done many utter stupidities in the past. Please add his role of Dr. Arya in Krrish to that list.
Produced, directed and co-written by Mr. Rakesh Roshan, a one time failed actor, now a successful director - we are exposed to India's first official superhero. Krrish. Alas, this fish is so clownish you can't help but scream banish.
Besides the many "self passed judgments" by Bollywood over it's audience, there is this unflinching preposterousness which makes it firmly believe that brains in Indians stop working after the age of 5. The result? Another dumb caper that will make Superman hide behind his cape... errr.
According to Roshan Sr., he was inspired to make Krrish, after watching "Lord of the Rings". Really? Or was it "Bored of the Bing Bings".
And yes I want to beat my head on my keyboard when the business of reviews is being handled by eggheads, pinheads and I don't know where's my head.
Why in the WHOLE MOTHERFUCKING WORLD WITH ALL ITS BILLION PLUS POPULATION, DO WE HAVE TO EXPERIENCE THE WORK OF A DIRECTOR WHO MAKES A BRAINLESS DISH, AND REVIEWERS WITH EQUALLY RETARDED BRAINS, LAPPING IT UP AS IF IT WAS THE TASTIEST BITE THEY EVER HAD??? SOMEBODY PLEASE FUCKING EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT - PAAPS - DID WE COMMIT IN OUR PREVIOUS LIFE THAT WE ARE NOW WATCHING MOVIES OF EGGHEADS AND REVIEWS OF PINHEADS.
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE???? Where the hell are the people in either of these fields who have even a micron of brain cells - extinct in Bollywood and the journalism that rides on it?
Krrish starts where its predecessor - Koi Mil Gaya put its brakes on. We now have a son who has the powers that are solely used for climbing mountains, jumping off trees, catching fish and romancing visiting-India-on-a-holiday Singaporish. Mr. Powerish is hidden for 20 years by Grandma-jee because the world is selfish.
But Powerish is in love with Singporish. Cho Cutish. She goes back home. Powerish is heartbroken. Grandma goes grim grum gro. After much ado, she gives up and packs Powerish to fly to Singporish. Betting goes bullish.
Alls well that ends well. But does it? Roshan Sr. has so many aces up his sleeves that would make the bosses at Vegas give up all their wealth and join oz in his journey to Sanyas.
So Powerish with a heart so goodish helps people of Singapore, by performing some martial arti-fish, saving people in a circus (does Singapore have something called a "Fire Brigade"?) and beating goons on motorbikes.
The media in the movie (which isn't any better than our real life - Egghead, Pinhead and company) goes bonkers. Who is Krrish? Who is Krrish? If the fear of being arrested had not been thrown into my internal system, my answer to that question would have been to unzip, pull my pants down and point my ass to the screen, to answer that question.
Meanwhile Dr. Meanie Beanie going ga ga over his future looking compuketor. The puter actually has the ability to play a picture of anybody's future on its 70mm screen. Since it doesn't run on Windows, rebooting has been religiously avoided.
And so it is inevitable. Powerish and Breaking News Beanie are set for a clash. No points for guessing who gets bashed.
Question: Why project your product as a Superhero caper when for 2 hours and 15 minutes you simply play a pathetic romance story with the last of 15 minutes focused on wired stunts?
This movie was an excuse to push down your throat a 1960s playing in slow motion - romance jerker, a 1980s revenge drama where facial expressions go grim graw groan and 15 minutes of Chinese stunt play - All this in the name of a superhero film.
Which begs this question... what was Roshan Sr. thinking? Is this the thinking style of Bollywood? Is this what it comes up with in the name of Screenwriting?
Coming to the special effects, where does the money go? Bollywood has this uncanny ability to spend millions on special effects which just don't show up on your screen. Effects are reduced to comic book postures. Lazy, ridiculous and amateurish.
Chinese wire stunts are effective only in a blink and miss sequence where the hero jumps on and off cliff tops during a mountain climbing expedition.
Of the cast Rekha tries her best to blow life in the lifeless journey. Priyanka Chopra should add "ham" as her middle name. While Naseer - the less said the better.
Clearly this is a package for Hrithik Roshan. Present in almost each and every frame, Roshan tries his best to fit into the role. But does he really have to over exert himself during the superhero sequences? Most of his time is spent romancing the heroine which doesn't leave much wiggle room to extend the boundaries of his true capabilities. This is an intelligent actor used quite ordinarily.
In the end, the reason one may back this movie would be on the basis that it's meant for kids. I disagree. The scripts on Cartoon Network have more entertainment value than Krrish's pathetic screenplay. And I'm not sure if kids want to sit through a 130 minutes of adult romance to be able to see a miniscule 15 minutes of the superhero in action.
Krrish could have been a neat platform to build a chain of sequels.
Unfortunately the product is clownish that goes all out of its way to have your brain cells punished. Money it may make. Krrish fans... I think not.
C Minus. One word. Disappointing.
Movie Review: Krrish - Koi Childish Gaya...
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IndianArchie
URL
June 23, 2006
02:24 PM
Stop trying to sound like that Fiza and Tehzeeb director...it only makes the review utterly irritating!
GG
June 23, 2006
03:21 PM
IndianArchie,
You mean Khalid Mohammed.
gg
drac
June 25, 2006
07:19 PM
The movie is a good try. It was a feel good movie for me. It was fun watching the superhero jump, because all the while I was expecting something ridiculous, but at the end of it, it was believable.
I have also watched Matrix and Spiderman. Some parts maybe copied, but it's copied well. The problem here is some Indians can't imagine bollywood going sci-fi. It's just a movie, so lighten up. Anyways, I enjoyed Krrish more than the Da Vinci Code.
Vinay Tripathi
June 26, 2006
12:35 AM
Good to see your review, I live in Australia and I saw the movie yesterday. From my point of view, the movie was very well directed and presented. Under any scenario the movie was noway less than any Hollywood movie.
I don't know why but we Indians are not prepared to accept any changes, I am sure that the review would have been very different if this would have been any Hollywood movie, why are we prepared to support and praise any C class hollywood movie but not ready to praise a very well directed Bollywood movie.
I don't know about others but I think that this movie is very good and worth watching. Good to see the correct and perfect use of technology.
Vinay
giddu
June 26, 2006
01:19 AM
The utter pretentiousness and pettiness exhibited in this review is downright disgusting.
Deepti lamba
URL
June 26, 2006
03:01 AM
Stupendous, fab-u-lous, creative, heartfelt....the movie? ...nah the review;) Rather see Chacha Chowdary twirling his mushees on screen than Hrithik in his MC Hammer pants doing desi Matrix stunts.
satish
URL
June 26, 2006
03:39 AM
(irrelevant personal attack) ... It was worth a watch... very well directed ..and dosent bore u at all ..Not bad
Kush
URL
June 26, 2006
06:51 AM
C Minus. One word. Disappointing...
Hee.hee..
drac
June 26, 2006
03:46 PM
Aaman... now that you have edited Satish's comment, I request you to edit the article itself. Desi train has attacked other reviewers, and has used objectionable language. Please be fair.
Sanjay
June 26, 2006
09:21 PM
In the middle of watching Krrish right now... just had to take time out to say that this thing is garbage.
Yeah, good to see that Hrithik still has the muscles today, but the only thing I liked him in was Lakshya. And that was good only because Farhan Akhtar did it.
The special FX are painfully bad. I just wish I could see the wires holding Hrithik up, because at least they would distract me. Oh Hrithik, at least you were lovable as a moron. Here, you're just embarrassing. If you don't get any better, you're going to end up like (shudder) Bobby Deol.
The only action-hero I really like these days is Arjun Rampal -- he just needs to be paired up with a good director.
Dammit, where did all the good action-heroes go?
Sanjay
June 27, 2006
12:01 AM
Still watching Krrish, in all its excruciating awfulness. Hrithik does unfortunately tend to over-act. It's amazing that Farhan Akhtar was able to get him to subdue this tendency for much of Lakshya (one of my favorite movies, btw), or at least harness it properly.
I don't really like the wild long-haired look, and think most Indian men are better off with short hair. While he's obviously a coordinated dancer, I think his gregarious grinning is shown a little too frequently.
Flashes of Jan-Michael Vincent in that Disney movie, The World's Greatest Athlete. I used to like TV actor Dwight Schultz's character "Howlin Mad Murdoch" from the A-Team series. That over-animated zaniness is something more Hrithik's speed.
Amrita
URL
June 27, 2006
03:42 AM
HAHAHA!
you actually paid to see that stuff? didnt you see the trailors? get thee to youtube
krrish
June 27, 2006
05:33 AM
u think the the movie is dissapointing then y dont u move ur fat fukin ass and make a betta 1 u samosa eating sanavabich
Righta
URL
June 27, 2006
06:08 AM
Its a childrens movie, y r u all doing a matured critique on it. The children(and some like minded adults :) love it, the box office is clinking with metal, Roshan's r getting richer, y should u be sad?.
Sanjay
June 27, 2006
06:41 PM
LOL @ krrish -- hey, I already told you I liked Hrithik's previous movie Lakshya a lot. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it to you. But that was made by Farhan Akhtar (son of Javed Akhtar), and he's a director of Hollywood calibre, not of mere bollywood trash tastes. Farhan Akhtar should leave India and go on to make great films for better audiences than India has to offer. He was born for better things. Indian audiences only want to watch gyrating women with water flowing all over their bodies, which is why nearly every bollywood film has them.
Sanjay
June 27, 2006
06:51 PM
Righta: Give me a break, that's the same pathetic excuse that George Lucas used, after audiences hated Star Wars The Phantom Menace and JarJar Binks. Lucas quickly claimed he had really been aiming for the children's market, and said people were judging the film out of context. What nonsense -- that movie was never marketed for children's audiences, and neither was Krrish. The fact is that Krrish was being marketed like Spiderman, Superman, or The Matrix. The child audience excuse is just something that people trot out when they make a bad product, just like when spoilt fruit is diverted to the juice-making market as a fallback.
Anyway, I do like superhero movies as a genre -- just not this one. I'm eagerly awaiting the next Spiderman, and even Spielberg's upcoming Transformers movie.
Sanjay
June 27, 2006
11:13 PM
Here, this is a better showcase of Hrithik's great talents, much better than Krrish:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2cDZX-Gk_vk
Have to admit, he's really a top-notch dancer.
drac
June 28, 2006
05:09 AM
Sanjay, even I like superhero movies as a genre. But you're different from me in that I'm willing to give bollywood a chance. Just imagine the hit movie Spiderman 2 in Hindi. The dialogues would be too loud instead of husky. Not that I have a problem, but the hollywood obsessed people will squirm at it. We have a different culture, mannerisms which will be reflected in the movies.
drac
June 28, 2006
05:16 AM
But ofcourse, India is a large country with internal cultural differences. Besides the major portion of the opinionated Indians form the NRI/PIO group, with yet another taste. I respect that.
But look at desitrain; in his review, he calls those who liked the movie as pinheads and retards.
This is one of the worst ways of writing a review.
Ted
June 28, 2006
01:27 PM
I too am an Aussie resident, currently in teens and i find this movie a big rip-off if nothing else off western superheroes. In a sentence, its Tarzan go Spiderman, Flash, Superman, Batman combined. Boy from wild meets girl (Jane in tarzan) who is forcing him to come to her country. Pretty Tarzanish to me. Then the guy turns superhero for putting on a mask he finds on the ground at a circus, yes a circus mask, finds a leather coat and becomes a superhero overnight in the eyes of the media and the entire singapore population. The only partly good aspects were the post-interval stunts, the earlier ones were clearly identifiable as done with wires. C'mon the guy is swimming through small tree branchers and wiggling his feet in the air when he jumps sometimes not even properly landing a step. Its damn obvious.
If some people havent noticed, the character is meant to be extraordinarily smart and a quick learner, yet he acts like his retarded father most of the movie. Songs were as pathetic as any other lately released movie. To add to this did anyone notice the repetition of background set in the circus song to the "Sab khel hai" song in Koi Mil Gaya?
I read other reviews, all bullshit. Kiss ups. This movie was speculated for great success, yet it has not been able to deliver, missing by miles. It will never live upto its predecessor, KMG.
Indian superheroes will always be pathetic. They will always be corny. As pathetic as Shaktiman and I used to think that was pathetic when I was 7. KMG pushed boundaries of Aliens, I think that was quite far, yet it turned out a success, but Tarzan turned Superhero is just taking your imagination equivalent to a 4 YO child.
Wouldn't recommend to anyone over 5 years of age or someone suffering from life-threatening mental illnessses.
drac
June 28, 2006
04:05 PM
Even ET by Steven Spielberg had Aliens, but it was an awesome movie. And by the way, if Krrish is kiddish, then so is Koi Mil Gaya. And Spiderman - 1 and 2 (it had a dialogue: 'eat your vegetables').
Like I read somewhere, Krrish is a movie for kids of the age from 6 to 60.
Sanjay
June 29, 2006
01:55 AM
drac, I actually have a copy of Spiderman1 in Hindi, and it was very professionally dubbed, so it was quite nice.
I'm saying that one can't reflexively hide behind the vague excuse of cultural differences to explain crappy film-making in India, because then anything becomes excusable.
Here, would you like to see the old bollywood version of Superman:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XLbHFQPmH4E&search=superman%20india
Why do they have to go out of their way to make such bad crap? In India, most of the filmmakers are mercenaries who will make anything for a buck. Why do you think that so many Indian films come out in such high volume? Their unprofessional hacks can only fall back on quantity over quality.
And the few films that are well-made, are usually slammed by the critics who will favour trash, since these critics are so rentable.
How long will we fall back on the cultural excuse? Refuge of scoundrels, I say.
drac
June 29, 2006
05:52 AM
Sanjay, I was talking about a remake of Spiderman in Hindi, and not just dubbing. (Actors should be Indian.)
And if you see, this review has actually attacked Krrish.. so why are you so upset?
Tell me Sanjay, what is wrong with this film? Why do you hate it so much? (I admit action scenes are largely copied, but then which bollywood movie doesn't copy?) Ok so, you hate it because of Hrithik's hair? LOL.
I liked the idea of the computer showing the future of the villian - his death. Because anyways, it was very predictable that hrithik would win the duel. I think it was well directed.
Sanjay
June 29, 2006
11:43 PM
I feel that Hrithik's work in Lakshya and Koi Mil Gaya much superior to Krrish. Movies like Krrish will only pull Hrithik back towards mediocrity and away from his superstar-status obtained from KMG and Lakshya. I am also complaining about Bollywood's lack of quality and taste. Perhaps it's the shape of the Indian market which encourages low quality. People mainly look for ethnic credentials of an actor -- ie. is there some niche demographic who particularly and fervently identify with the actor and who will therefore put him over the top (Muslims: SRK, Salman Khan, Amir Khan, etc; Maharashtrians: Amitabh, Abhishek, etc; South Indians: Nagarjuna, Rajkumar, etc)
Oh, nobody likes to say it too overtly, but Indian film industry is dominated by ethnic preferences, so that talent, quality and originality take a back seat. One could say that ethnicity also counts in Hollywood too (Denzel, Wesley Snipes, etc) but not so predominantly.
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